There’s nothing like serious journalism, which avoids sensationalism and instead serves up a sensible, level-headed exploration of complex issues for the edification of the public.
Unfortunately this article from the Daily Mail is nothing like serious journalism.
Instead it appears to have been written by someone who wants to script the next Die Hard movie.
Alongside the Daily Mail’s sidebar of shame with “news” that - back when she was 19 years old - Angelina Jolie had some photos taken with her bra off, that a pregnant footballer’s wife wears a bikini on the beach, and that somebody I’ve never heard of is wearing a “daring low-cut swimsuit” in Barbados, is some fantasy about a North Korean internet attack on Great Britain.
The article, which has somehow appeared in the newspaper’s “news” section, describes the UK’s air traffic control system coming under attack, nuclear power stations being electronically compromised in a bid to make them meltdown, and “the computer systems of every major bank in the City of London had been simultaneously attacked.”
As if that weren’t bad enough, jets are said to be falling out the sky and the UK’s water system poisoned.
According to the Daily Mail, Prime Minister David Cameron even joins in the fun with a speech about the apocalyptic events and the UK’s military response:
‘Today has been the darkest day in our island’s history,’ said Cameron. ‘We have been the victim of a cyber-attack that has destroyed a nuclear power station, downed numerous aircraft, wounded our financial system and hampered our oil and water infrastructures. The cost in lives has been, and will continue to be, immense. But today we will not just be victims. We shall also retaliate.
‘There is no doubt who committed this attack — it was the North Koreans.
‘I do not want to be the Prime Minister who allowed this murderous regime to get away with this horrific assault on our lives and values.
‘As I speak to you, one of our submarines is preparing to launch a series of Trident nuclear missiles at Pyongyang and other targets in North Korea. Within one hour, Kim’s regime will be no more, and we shall once again be safe.’
It’s all clearly bonkers.
Next week, no doubt, we’ll be reading in our national newspapers details of how a teenage wizard has defeated Lord Voldermort and that Earth has beaten Alpha Centauri in the intergalactic ping pong championship (while wearing “daring low-cut swimsuits”).